Mummy can I have some?

I was laughing and swapping stories with a friend over the children’s antics, her children like mine always wanted a share of whatever Daddy or Mummy were eating and how it’s so rare to finish your food alone as a parent.

“Well, I guess we’re paying for doing the same thing to our parents, ” I said as I shared stories of my antics with my parents on the same matter. We ended the conversation both accepting it was a phase for most children and they would outgrow it.

Something happened recently that questioned the conclusion I had reached on that subject.

Eziaha of coachE.ng had shared a tip (on her WhatsApp status) about something she had learned from John Ortberg’s book, which she restructured for her children. The idea is to teach them self control and delayed gratification by discouraging them from desiring everything they see. I put it to practice by teaching my children about it…

They are t understand, “I am not my eyes, my mouth or my stomach, meaning it’s not everything your eyes see that should enter your mouth and go into your stomach. They agreed to the deal that night after I explained, but the next day I was drinking water and Nuggie as usual (except they are not around, I can not remember finishing any water I pick up by myself, as if there is extra sweetness in my water) Nuggie asked, ” Mummy can I have some water?” I wanted to give her then I remembered. So I pointed at my eyes and said, I am not my…? They recited after me and then asked,
“Mummy even water?”
“Yes, in everything” I replied but gave in and told her, “I will give you this once but no more after now.” We are still learning the concept, I believe I need to understand myself, that giving them everything just because they ask does not equate care too.

Usually, when they ask, “can I have some?” My first thought was, they are just children and it’s a phase (besides they don’t take without permission and they asked politely) but what effect is that having in the adult they will become? A child who has mastered self-control and delayed gratification become an adult who can master life… It’s in the little things.

It goes both ways too… Adults(single and married) too are not exempted, those of us who now struggle with delayed gratification and self-control over food/money/sex e.t.c. it all started from somewhere…

“You are not your eyes, mouth or stomach(or whichever part of the body your weakness is)”

Are you allowing a part of the body control the entire body?