Relocation, Comfort zone and Fear of the unknown
Recently, my family changed location, we knew what we wanted for ourselves and the children. We also knew it was time for another phase in our lives.
Before the change, we couldn’t put out the fear. Questions tumbled in and out of my mind. Are we sure? Did God say we should move? Can we adjust? What if…?
We had misgivings about it. But as they say, the fear of losing shouldn’t stop you from playing the game. So we overcame the fear and moved.
Now here I am in another state. I’m in a new office, in a new department with entirely different job descriptions, and new colleagues.
What about getting the children settled in a new school in a different environment?
While I am excited about the change, it proves to be overwhelming. But I hold the bigger picture in my head. Like the allusion, Paul gave: when a king is a baby, he is at the mercy of his teachers and servants, until he is of age to recognize his power and duties.
In this new place, I am still trying to put names and positions to faces. So whether you are a cleaner or the boss, since I’m new, I treat everyone like the boss, until I get to know who is who. I also tag along and observe, so I can learn the ropes.
This could be tiring for some people, but for me, I feel like a child left in the middle of a candy store. I now see everything as exciting.
There are two things I discovered, lately: people’s resistance to change and the uneasy feeling that comes with asking questions, asking for directions, and receiving help. These are inevitable doors to growth.
Sometimes, life tells you it’s time for a change, but the fear of the unknown—starting all over, looking like a failure — holds you back and you convince yourself that your present state is still manageable. In the same manner, you’re scared to ask questions, to ask for help, and this only keeps you in a spot.
You will always come to a place in life where you are the baby king/queen, who’s at the mercy of others. The ability to learn from your teachers and servants will be a preparation for leadership, while you grow into readiness to take your throne.
No one is useless. Just have the sense of a cow and spit out the sticks (useless information) while you chew the grass.
Except you want to remain at a spot in your life without growth, you can neither avoid change nor avoid asking for help. At any stage of your life, be open-minded and ask questions.
Poju Oyemade shared a piece of advice. He said, maybe because you were brilliant when you were in school, scoring high grades, people ask you for help. So, you keep telling yourself, I know the way, everybody was always asking me.
You think you don’t need to ask for or take directions from others and you keep moving, even when you know you’re wrong. You have associated asking for help with failures. But real life is not usually like that. You better ask and stop thinking you already know.
What change have you been convincing yourself not to accept? Have you convinced yourself that change is a bad idea?
What do you think of starting anew?
Are you uncomfortable asking for or receiving help?
Remember, the extent to which you think you know is where another person’s knowledge begins.